Khóa luận A study on written structures, personal pronoun, decision and attitude expressions in commercial correspondence - Đinh Thị Thu Hà

Nội dung text: Khóa luận A study on written structures, personal pronoun, decision and attitude expressions in commercial correspondence - Đinh Thị Thu Hà

1. BỘ GIÁO DỤC VÀ ĐÀO TẠO TRƯỜNG ĐẠI HỌC DÂN LẬP HẢI PHÒNG ISO 9001 : 2008 KHÓA LUẬN TỐT NGHIỆP NGÀNH: NGOẠI NGỮ HẢI PHÒNG - 2010
2. HAIPHONG PRIVATE UNIVERSITY FOREIGN LANGUAGE DEPARTMENT GRADUATION PAPER A STUDY ON WRITTEN STRUCTURES, PERSONAL PRONOUN, DECISION AND ATTITUDE EXPRESSIONS IN COMMERCIAL CORRESPONDENCE By: Đinh Thị Thu Hà Class: NA1001 Supervisor: Mai Văn Sao. MA HAI PHONG - 2010
3. BỘ GIÁO DỤC VÀ ĐÀO TẠO TRƯỜNG ĐẠI HỌC DÂN LẬP HẢI PHÒNG Nhiệm vụ đề tài tốt nghiệp Sinh viên: Mã số: Lớp: Ngành: Tên đề tài:
4. Nhiệm vụ đề tài 1. Nội dung và các yêu cầu cần giải quyết trong nhiệm vụ đề tài tốt nghiệp ( về lý luận, thực tiễn, các số liệu cần tính toán và các bản vẽ). 2. Các số liệu cần thiết để thiết kế, tính toán. 3. Địa điểm thực tập tốt nghiệp.
5. CÁN BỘ HƯỚNG DẪN ĐỀ TÀI Người hướng dẫn thứ nhất: Họ và tên: Học hàm, học vị: Cơ quan công tác: Nội dung hướng dẫn: Người hướng dẫn thứ hai: Họ và tên: Học hàm, học vị: Cơ quan công tác: Nội dung hướng dẫn: Đề tài tốt nghiệp được giao ngày 12 tháng 04 năm 2010 Yêu cầu phải hoàn thành xong trước ngày 10 tháng 07 năm 2010 Đã nhận nhiệm vụ ĐTTN Đã giao nhiệm vụ ĐTTN Sinh viên Người hướng dẫn Hải Phòng, ngày tháng năm 2010 HIỆU TRƯỞNG GS.TS.NGƯT Trần Hữu Nghị PHẦN NHẬN XÉT TÓM TẮT CỦA CÁN BỘ HƯỚNG DẪN
6. 1. Tinh thần thái độ của sinh viên trong quá trình làm đề tài tốt nghiệp: 2. Đánh giá chất lượng của khóa luận (so với nội dung yêu cầu đã đề ra trong nhiệm vụ Đ.T. T.N trên các mặt lý luận, thực tiễn, tính toán số liệu ): 3. Cho điểm của cán bộ hướng dẫn (ghi bằng cả số và chữ): Hải Phòng, ngày tháng năm 2010 Cán bộ hướng dẫn (họ tên và chữ ký) NHẬN XÉT ĐÁNH GIÁ CỦA NGƯỜI CHẤM PHẢN BIỆN ĐỀ TÀI TỐT NGHIỆP
7. 1. Đánh giá chất lượng đề tài tốt nghiệp về các mặt thu thập và phân tích tài liệu, số liệu ban đầu, giá trị lí luận và thực tiễn của đề tài. 2. Cho điểm của người chấm phản biện : (Điểm ghi bằng số và chữ) Ngày tháng năm 2010 Người chấm phản biện
8. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS In the process of doing the graduation paper, I have faced up with not only many problems in lexicology, reference materials but also difficulties in choosing the right way to express my ideas. However, I have received a lot of guidance, assistance, and enthusiasm from my supervisor- Mai Van Sao. MA and other teachers in Foreign Language Department of Haiphong Private University. Thanks to these helps, I have overcome the difficulties and completed my graduation paper successfully. First of all, I would like to express my deep gratitude to Mai Van Sao. MA, my supervisor, who has given me his whole- hearted assistance, precious advice, valuable guidance, constant support and cautious correction which help me much in completing this paper. My sincere thanks also go to other teachers of Foreign Language Department, Haiphong Private University for their previously supporting lectures as well as their dedicated help and advice during my graduation paper. Last but far from the least, my thanks are presented to my family and many of my friends for their encouragement, inspiration in the process of completing this paper. Sincerely, Haiphong, June 2010 Student Dinh Thi Thu Ha
9. TABLE OF CONTENT Acknowledgement Table of content PART ONE: INTRODUCTION 1. Rationale of the study 1 2. Aims of the study 2 3. Scopes of the study 2 4. Methods of the study 2 5. Design of the study 2 PART TWO: DEVELOPMENT CHAPTER 1: THEORETICAL BACKGROUND AND OVERVIEW OF COMMERCIAL CORRESPONDENCE A, Theoretical background: 4 2.1 Written structures (Kinds of sentence) 4 2.1.1 Definitions 4 2.1.2 Kinds of sentence 5 2.1.3 Sentence and utterance 9 2.1.4 Politeness 10 2.2 Personal pronoun 10 2.3 Decision and attitude expressions (Modality) 12 B, Overview of Commercial Correspondence 18 2.1 Definitions 18 2.1.1 Correspondence 18 2.1.2 Commercial Correspondence 18
10. 2.2 Forms of Commercial Correspondence 19 2.3 Types of Commercial Correspondence 22 2.4 Politeness in Commercial Correspondence 23 CHAPTER 2: A STUDY ON WRITTEN STRUCTURES, PERSONAL PRONOUN, DECISION AND ATTITUDE EXPRESSIONS IN COMMERCIAL CORRESPONDENCE A, A study on written structures in Commercial Correspondence 24 2.1 Overview of sentence kinds in Commercial Correspondence 24 2.2 Sentence kinds in Commercial Correspondence of English in comparison with one of Vietnamese. 26 2.2.1 Statement 26 2.2.2 Question 31 2.2.3 Command 34 2.2.4 Exclamation 36 B, A study on personal pronoun in Commercial Correspondence 37 2.1 The system of personal pronouns in the salutation 38 2.1.1 The system of personal pronouns in the salutation of letters written in English 38 2.1.2 The system of personal pronouns in the salutation of letters written in Vietnamese 40 2.2 The system of personal pronouns in the body: 42 2.2.1 The system of personal pronouns in the body of letters written in English 42 2.2.2 The system of personal pronouns in the body of letters written in Vietnamese 44
11. C, A study on decision and attitude expressions in Commercial Correspondence (Modality) 46 2.1 Modality in letters written in English 46 2.2 Modality in letters written in Vietnamese 51 CHAPTER 3: FINDINGS AND IMPLICATIONS A, Findings 53 B, Implications 54 3.1 Solutions 54 3.2 Teaching and learning proposals 56 PART THREE: CONCLUSION 1. Summary of the study 58 2. Some suggestions for further research 58 References 60 Appendix 62
12. PART ONE: INTRODUCTION 1. RATIONALE OF THE STUDY We all know English is a common language over the world- international language. Therefore, it plays an important role in activities related to international scope. Commercial Correspondence is an activity not only between partners having the same language but also between those having different language. From that, we can see the necessity of composing and translating Commercial Correspondence. The Commercial Correspondence composers and translators not only need to be armed with knowledge of Commercial English but also have knowledge of writing skill and translating skill. Those have to be improved day by day. Commercial Correspondence composing is a little bit different from Commercial Correspondence translating. The composers need to know clearly their partners. From that they can compose a letter with their right objective. A standardized Commercial Correspondence should have its accuracy, purity, politeness, preciseness, avoid redundancy or going around the bush. If so, the partners can understand and do as our objectives. Different from composers, translators may not know clearly the two partners. They may be the students who translating Commercial Correspondence to serve their studying requirements. However, translating Commercial Correspondence from English to Vietnamese or vice versa, translators should have a certain comparison of form and language of two Commercial Correspondence languages. In addition, they need to have an abundant business term sources. So that, they can make the sentences flexible, precise and easily-understood. In modern life, using Commercial Correspondence is really important in trading and financing activities. That‟s why the requirement of composing and translating skills is higher and higher. However, it‟s not very difficult for students. 1
13. As a result, I decide to take “a study on written structures, personal pronoun, decision and attitude expressions in Commercial Correspondence” with the hope that students who share the same difficulties in doing these skills will have different look about this work. I would like to contribute and share my little knowledge and experience in Commercial Correspondence composition and translation to all student of English Department and Economic Department, even to people who work for company. 2. AIMS OF THE STUDY My intention to take a study on Commercial Correspondence aims at several points: It is my purpose to point out an overview on related theoretical background of Commercial Correspondence, business terms during the study; the main aims of the study is a comparison of the real status between written structures, personal pronoun, decision and attitude expressions used in Business Correspondence, and from then, finds out some strategies to compose a good letter for students. 3. SCOPES OF THE STUDY This study mainly focuses on written structures, personal pronoun, decision and attitude expressions in Commercial Correspondence (50 letters written in Vietnamese and English) collected from books, newspapers, magazines, internet, company etc. 4. METHODS OF THE STUDY As mentioned above, the study is completed thanks to information collected from internet, books to get theoretical background. After that, the analysis on 50 letters is carried out to get basic knowledge and specific exemplifications. To make the study more persuasive and interesting, some examples are taken from some close companies and reliable sources. 5. DESIGN OF THE STUDY My graduation paper consists of three main parts, of which the second part named Development, chapter 2 is of great importance. 2
14. PART ONE: INTRODUCTION Indicates the rationale, the aims, the scopes, the methods and the design of the study. PART TWO: DEVELOPMENT Focuses on the main contents of the study and it is further divided into three chapters:  Chapter 1: deals with theoretical background together with overview of Commercial Correspondence.  Chapter 2: namely a study on written structures, personal pronoun, decision and attitude expressions in Commercial Correspondence with following key factors: firstly, written structures (sentence); secondly, personal pronoun; thirdly, decision and attitude expressions (modality).  Chapter 3: refers to some findings and implications I find out during this study. PART THREE: CONCLUSION Gives a brief summary of the study and some suggestions for further research. 3
15. PART TWO: DEVELOPMENT CHAPTER 1: THEORETICAL BACKGROUND AND OVERVIEW OF COMMERCIAL CORRESPONDENCE A, Theoretical background: 2.1 Written structures (Kinds of sentence) 2.1.1 Definitions A sentence is the combination of words or phrases on the basic of grammatical rules like words, concord between the sentence elements and other rules. It forms the meaningful units which serve the purpose of communication [16]. A sentence is the largest unit of grammatical organization within which parts of speech (e.g.: nouns, verbs, adverbs, adjectives ) and grammatical classes (e.g.: word, phrase, clause) are said to function. In English, a sentence normally contains one independent clause [15]. A sentence is neither a physical event nor a physical object. It is, conceived abstractly, a string of words puts together by the grammatical rules of a language. A sentence can be said of as the ideal string words behind various realizations in utterance and inscriptions [16]. A sentence is a complete unit of meaning. When we speak our sentences may be extremely involved or even unfinished. Yet we can still convey our meaning through intonation gesture, facial expression, etc When we write these devices are not available, so sentences have to be carefully structured and punctuated. A written sentence must begin with a capital letter and end with a full stop (.), a question mark (?) or an exclamation mark (!) [17: 2]. The meaning of a sentence is not the sum of the meanings of the words used in the sentence. It is more correct to regard it as the function of the meanings of the words used in the sentence, modality and structural meanings signaled by the way that words are organized into a sentence. 4
16. Here are some definitions of a sentence, far from all. But, these definitions give us the basic understandings of a sentence. Every linguist has the personal ideal, so there are many different definitions. In the limited length of paper, it is not possible and not necessary to sharply urge about them. We find that it is suitable to give a following definition to the aims of the study: “A sentence is the largest unit of grammatical organization within which parts of speech (e.g.: nouns, verbs, adverbs, adjectives ) and grammatical classes (e.g.: word, phrase, clause) are said to function, normally contains one independent clause, can be said of as the ideal string words behind various realizations in utterance and inscriptions”. 2.1.2 Kinds of sentence Kinds of sentence in language are very complex and they are classified basing on many different criterions: according to the structure or according to the communicative function. a, _ According to the structure (simple sentence, compound sentence, complex sentence and compound- complex sentence):  Simple sentence contains one finite clause where all sentence elements are expressed by phrases. Ex: He is a teacher of English.  Compound sentence contains two or more independent clauses joined by coordinating conjunctions like and, or, but etc. Ex: She said goodbye, and went away.  Complex sentence contains two or more clauses of which one is the main clause and the other is the subordinate clause. Ex: We didn‟t understand what she meant. Compound- complex sentence contains both coordination and subordination. Ex: If you want to lose weight, work more and eat less. 5
17. b,_ According to the communicative function (statement, question, command and exclamation):  Statement is a sentence in which the subject is always present and general precedes the verb. Ex: She is reading. He isn‟t with me now.  Question often involves subject- operator in version together with rising intonation or placement of who- element in the initial position (concrete question later).  Yes/ No question:  General Yes/ No question: formed by placing operator before subject (plus a rising intonation more often). - Yes/ No question with positive orientation: Ex: Has the man left? - Yes/ No question with negative orientation: Ex: Can‟t you give us any hope of success?  Tag question (a short question that follows a statement): assumption and expectation depending on the tone used by the speaker. Component 1 Component 2 Positive Negative Negative Positive - Rising tone ( ): Positive/ negative assumption + Neutral expectation Ex: He can do these, can‟t he?  Yes, he can./ No, he can‟t. - Falling tone ( ): Positive assumption + Positive expectation 6
18. Ex: You know him, don‟t you? Negative assumption + Negative expectation Ex: They haven‟t finished it, have they? No, they haven‟t.  Declarative question: this exceptional type of Yes/ No question is identical in form to a statement, except for the final rising tone. Ex: You realize what risks are?  Exclamatory question: a question in form but is functionally like an exclamatory. They are marked by falling instead of rising tone. Negative: Hasn‟t she grown! Positive: Did he look annoyed!  Who- question (interrogation)  Who- question on S, Od, Oi, Cs and modifier on Noun Phrase Ex: Who went to London?  Wh- question on adverbial or sometimes on Cs, Co with How + Adj Ex: Where will you come back?  Alternative question: - Common alternative question: Ex: Did you come () by train or by bus ( )? We came by bus. - Alternative plus Yes/ No question: final rising tone requires either choice of the given options (often with initial “yes”) or supplement of proper element (when saying “no”). Ex: Did you go by train or by bus? Yes, I went by train. 7
19. No, I went by plane. - Alternative plus Who- question: Ex: A: How did you come? ( ) By train or by bus? ( ) B: Oh! I came by bus.  Command is a sentence that makes use of the imperative mood in the main or sometimes of questions with initial modal, particularly with invitations or requests.  Command without a Subject: These have imperative finite verb as the main element. Ex: Leave it at the door.  Command with a Subject:  With “YOU” as a Subject: Strong irritation: Ex: You there be quiet! Singling out two or more distinct addresses: Ex: You come here, Jack, and you go over there, Mary. As requests or invitations: Ex: Will you sit down, please.  With a definite pronoun Subject: Ex: Everybody shuts their eyes.  Command with “LET” First person imperatives can be formed by proposing the verb. “LET” followed by a subject in the objective case. Ex: Let me see! 8
20.  Exclamation:  Full exclamation:  What + Noun Phrase: Ex: What an enormous crowd camel!  How + Ad/ Adv: Ex: How wonderful she was!  Short exclamation (with elliptic Subject and Verb):  What + Noun Phrase: Ex: What a day!  How + Ad: Ex: How beautiful!  Ad only: Ex: Well- done! To the aims of the study, sentence types are carried out according to the communicative function. 2.1.3 Sentence and utterance One may ask why it is necessary to distinguish between sentence and utterance. The reason lies in the possibility to recognize what meanings are communicated in language and which meanings are derived from contexts. Also it makes sense to tell the difference between linguistic meanings which are communicated by particular units of language and utterance meanings which occur as truncations between individuals in a particular place, at a particular time. Basically, what a sentence is to an utterance is just like language to speech [7: 55]. An utterance is often regarded a stretch of speech before which and after which there is a pause. An utterance is the USE by a particular speaker, on a 9
21. particular occasion, of a piece of a language, such as a sequence of sentences, a phrase or even a single word [7:57]. 2.1.4 Politeness The definition of politeness is really abstract: In the term of culture, politeness considers as “the idea of polite social behavior or etiquette within a culture” [2: 60]. Therefore, the rules of politeness reflect sharply in the culture and they are quite different among languages. According to Layoff (1973, 1989), politeness as “a system of interpersonal relations designed to facilitate interaction by minimizing the potential for conflict and confrontation inherent in all human interchange” [3: 21]. According to John, Gompers and other authors, “politeness as basic to the production of social order, and a precondition of human cooperation” [4: 13]. According to Leech (1983), politeness as “those forms of behavior which are aimed at the establish and maintain of “comity”, that is, the ability of participants in a social communicative interaction to engage an atmosphere of relative harmony” [4: 104]. In this study, after considering all ideas, we give the definition of politeness: politeness as “a system of interpersonal relations designed to facilitate interaction by minimizing the potential for conflict and confrontation inherent in all human interchange”, as those forms of behavior which are aimed at the establish and maintain of “comity”. This definition of politeness will help us choose the main tasks and solve the materials effectively forward to the aims of the study. 1.2 Personal pronoun The expression of politeness within the language behaviour is attracting the interests of the linguistics in general and the pragmatic linguistics in particular. Politely addressing in communication is under the strong pressure of community politeness which has the clear expressions such as clearness and reasonableness. Modesty in addressing, which is considered as the 10
22. principle of addressing politely in communication, is the way to show the community politeness. In Vietnamese, there are many ways to express the thoughts and feelings or attitude which differ from those in English. The social status, age, sex, and the family order are distinguished clearly and systematically. This is reflected in a distinctness clearly and systematically. This is reflected in a number of words for addressing such as “cụ, ông, bà, bác, cô, chú, thím, dì, dượng, cậu, anh, chị, ngài, quí vị, mày, em, ”. Such words are generally expressed by English people in one word “you”. So, personal pronoun is one of the most important parts that we must major in. Let‟s consider the below example. This is a dialogue between Jane Eyre (a young girl) and Mr. Rochester (more 20 years old than Jane) in literature work “Jane Eyre” [6: 196-205]: Rochester: “I love you. You, small and poor and plain, I ask you to marry me!” Jane: “You want to marry me, I cried, almost beginning to believe him. But I have no friends, no money, no family” Rochester: Tôi yêu em! Em, một người con gái nhỏ bé, nghèo và giản dị. Tôi muốn hỏi cưới em!” Jane: “Ông muốn cưới em? Tôi nói đầy vẻ ngạc nhiên và tôi bắt đầu cảm thấy tin ông. Nhưng em không có bạn bè, không có tiền bạc và cũng không có gia đình.” And the following example also shows clearly that the translator sometimes does not master the relationship between the speaker and the hearer leading to a funny translation. A mother was taking care of her child in hospital. She said: “I love you very much, dear”. Which was translated as “Em yêu anh lắm, cưng à” instead of “Mẹ yêu con lắm, cưng à”. Therefore, in any act of communication, addressing is, so to speak, unavoidable. Personal pronouns (address forms) not only play an important role in scientific, legal and commercial documents but also perform pragmatic functions. It can be said that, any Vietnamese learners of English have some 11
23. difficulties in speaking, rendering address forms from English into Vietnamese. Personal pronouns are pronouns used as substitutes for proper or common nouns. All known human languages have personal pronouns. We use personal pronouns, just as nouns, to refer to the people or the things, ideas were talking about. The system of personal pronouns in English: Nominative case Accusative case Possessive case (Chủ cách) (Tân cách) (Sở hữu cách) Personal pronoun I, you, she, he, Me, you, her, we, they him, us, them (Đại từ nhân xưng) Possessive adjective My, your, her, (Tính từ sở hữu) his, our, their Possessive Mine, yours, hers, him, ours, theirs (Đại từ sở hữu) In the study, we are going to focus on nominative case (actors). 1.3 Decision and attitude expressions (modality) Modality expresses the attitude and opinion of the speaker toward the representational content of the sentence. It is important to realize that technically “attitude” or “opinion” in this sense has little, if nothing, to do with the emotional states that a person undergoes. In point of fact, the interpersonal has to do with the functions of speech. It may be interesting to know that in pragmatics, this function is often referred to as the “illocutionary force”. Then the meaning of a sentence is the function of P (proposition) and F (illocutionary force) [7: 169]. Modality has become an issue of so much interest. Modality helps speakers to qualify their statements with respect to possibility or necessity. Negation is 12
24. often treated together with modality since it is connected to the factual status of a sentence through falsity and denial [7: 174]. English modality can be expressed by the process called grammaticalization (in the form of mood) and lexicalization (by means of lexical items like modal verbs and modal adverbs, or some other lexical verbs). In this research, because of comparison, we are going to focus on modality expressed by the lexicalization process in details:  Auxiliaries (Các trợ động từ tình thái): Language is not always used just to exchange information by making simple statements and asking questions. Sometimes, we want to make requests, offers, or suggestions, or to express our wishes or intentions. We want to be polite or tactful, or to indicate our feelings about what we are saying. Auxiliary is used more often and is the most important part in the decision and attitude expressions. Auxiliary helps to form a tense or an expression. They combine with present or past participles or with infinitive to form the tenses of ordinary verbs. We can do all these things by using a set of verbs called modals (modal auxiliaries). Modals form a small but significant part of English. They are used with other verbs to express (one of the modalities): possibility, ability, etc of the action. (1) Can: Possibility, ability (Chỉ khả năng, năng lực): Can you notify us of the availability of the goods? (ability) Computers can be customized according to users‟ needs. (possibility) Permission (Sự cho phép): They can let me pay by monthly installments. Theoretical possibility (Chỉ khả năng có thể xảy ra theo lý thuyết): Payment can be made by Banker‟s transfer without any delay. 13
25. (2) Could: Past possibility and ability (Chỉ khả năng, năng lực trong quá khứ): There was a fire at the warehouse last night. We could have lost all our stock. (past possibility) They could rarely meet delivery date. (past ability) Present or future permission (Sự cho phép hiện tại hoặc tương lai): Could we have 12% discount for any repeated orders? Contingent possibility in unreal conditions (Chỉ khả năng có thể xảy ra kèm theo hoặc năng lực trong điều kiện không trong thực tại): If It was sunny, the unloading could be in good conditions. We often use “can/ could”, and “will/ would” when we make a request to our partners, or “can/ could”, and “may” when we ask somebody before doing something. But “can” and “will” is used with direct actions than “could” or “would” is used. “Can” is less formal than “may” in this sense. (3) May: Permission (Chỉ sự cho phép): As mentioned above, we use “can” when we need a permission. But, in this sense, “may” is more formal than “can”. Instead of “may not” or rare “mayn‟t”, the stronger “mustn‟t” is often used in the negative to express prohibition. May I renew loans up to 9 months when they come due in case our customers fails to make their full payment? Usually factual possibility (Chỉ khả năng có thể xảy ra trên thực tế): The goods may be sent on any vessel of the Sellers‟s choice. (4) Might: Permission (Chỉ sự cho phép): restricted used. 14
26. Theoretical or factual possibility (Chỉ khả năng có thể xảy ra theo lý thuyết hoặc trên thực tế): We might take this matter into our thoroughly consideration. (5) Shall (I, We): Willingness (Chỉ sự tự nguyện): on the part of the speaker in 2nd and 3rd , restricted used. We shall inform you as soon as the goods are available. Intention (Chỉ ý định): on the part of the speaker. We shall give these points our earliest consideration. Insistent meaning or legal and quasi-legal injunctions (mang hàm nghĩa kiên quyết hoặc dùng trong các chỉ thị pháp lý): restricted used. You shall pay the balance one week before your departure. Above 4 meanings, intention meaning is used more often in business letters. In comparison with other auxiliaries, “shall” has a rare frequency and case. (6) Should: Obligation and logical necessity (Chỉ nghĩa vụ và sự cần thiết theo logic): You should keep an account of all your expenses. Criticism (Chỉ sự phê bình hay chỉ trích): after certain expressions. It was a mistake to get rid of those shares. You should not have sold them. In rather formal real conditions (Biểu thị tính nghi thức/ trang trọng trong mệnh đề trạng ngữ chỉ điều kiện có thể xảy ra): Please let us know as soon as possible if you should agree on this method of payment. 15
27. (7) Will: Spontaneous intention (Diễn đạt ý định tic this hay tự ý): usually contracted form “‟ll” , mainly first person (I‟ll): I don‟t think I‟ll stay in Geneva after the conference. Willingness in polite requests (Chỉ sự tự nguyện trong lời đề nghị lịch sự): Will you offer a 15% discount if the order is worth over $50.000? Intention (Chỉ ý định): usually contracted form and mainly first person (I‟ll) I‟ll write to inform you my availability. Insistence (Chỉ sự kiên quyết): stressed, hence no “‟ll” contraction. He will reply as soon as he gets this reminder. Prediction (specific prediction, timeless prediction, habitual prediction) (Chỉ sự dự đoán): the similar meanings of other expressions for logical necessity and habitual present. The contracted form “‟ll” is common. The exchange rate will fluctuate so all the related terms and conditions must be squared soon. (8) Would: Willingness (Chỉ sự tự nguyện): We would offer you a 12% discount if we get your firm order by 10th June. Insistence (Chỉ sự kiên quyết): There have always been further delays obtaining goods order as you would accept payments by irrevocable letter of credit. Characteristic activity in the past (Chỉ việc lặp đi lặp lại và mang tính đặc trưng trong quá khứ): 16
28. The bank would make a fuss if documents were inconsistent. Contingent use in the main clause of a conditional sentence (Chỉ cách dùng có điều kiện ở mệnh đề chính của câu điều kiện): International trade would be made easier if every country uses the same currency. Probability (Chỉ sự phỏng đoán, khả năng có thể xảy ra): Administrative procedures would be made more simple this time. (9) Must/ have to/ have got to: Compulsion or obligation, prohibition in the present tense (Chỉ sự bắt buộc hoặc nghĩa vụ): You must finish that report by 5.30 at the latest as it is urgent. (compulsion) I can‟t come to the meeting- I have got to finish this report. (obligation)  Acting verbs (động từ ngôn hành): allow, promise, guarantee, suggest, command etc.  Modal adjuncts (trạng từ tình thái bổ nghĩa cho cả câu): maybe, perhaps, probably, possibly, surely, hopefully, obviously etc.  Modal adjectives (tính từ tình thái): possible, probably, likely etc.  Modal nouns (danh từ tình thái): chance, likelihood, probability, possibility etc. To the aims of the study, we are going to focus on auxiliaries and modal adjuncts. 17
29. B, Overview of Commercial Correspondence: 2.1 Definitions 2.1.1 Correspondence Nowadays, Correspondence is a very popular activity for people in modern life. Therefore, the definition of Correspondence is also made by many authors: 1. Friendly intercourse; reciprocal exchange of civilities; especially, intercourse between persons by means of letters. Holding also good correspondence with the other great men in the state. Bacon. To facilitate correspondence between one part of London and another, was not originally one of the objects of the post office. Macaulay. 2. The letters which pass between correspondents. 3. Mutual adaptation, relation, or agreement, of one thing to another; agreement; congruity; fitness; relation. [1913 Webster] ( Lac Viet- multimedia tool for building multilingual dictionaries) 2.1.2 Commercial Correspondence Commercial Correspondence is a sub-aspect of Correspondence. A business letter is a letter written in formal language, usually used when writing from one business organization to another, or for correspondence between such organizations and their customers, clients and other external parties. The overall style of letter will depend on the relationship between the parties concerned. (World web Dictionary- Encyclopedia) Or simple understanding, a business letter is a letter deal with business. 18
30. 2.2 Forms of Commercial Correspondence Commercial Correspondence consists of many different forms and each form has its advantage: letter, memorandum, e- mail, fax, telephone call, voice mail, video conference, meeting etc. Form of Commercial Correspondence in common English Vietnamese The heading Sender’s address (sender‟s address) (written at the top- center of the (written at the top right- letter) corner) The heading (written at the center of the letter, The inside address after the sender‟s address) (written at the left margin, Salutation after the heading) (written at the center of the letter, The date after the heading) (written at the right margin, The body after the inside address) (written inside the Salutation whole margin of the letter) (written at the left margin, The close after the date) (written at the right margin) The body The date (written inside the whole (written at the right margin) margin of the letter) The signature The close (written at the right margin) (written at the left margin) Other parts Other parts (written at the left margin) (written at the left margin) Please consider the following letters as examples to see elements of Commercial Correspondence in English and Vietnamese. 19
31. Here below is an English business letter: PRADO REPROGRAPHIC 6 Praia Grande, Lisbon, Portugal Telephone: 65784 Fax: 54908 Lasers can Ltd 7 High street Birmingham UK 5 April 1997 Dear Sirs, At the beginning of March this year, we took delivery of one of your LS 500 laser colour separation machines on order No. 5468. Since then, the machine has broken down six times. The breakdowns have led to the loss of 12 days‟ production time while we waited for your local agents to fix the machine. The scanner has broken again. Although service is included on a one- year warranty, we do not want it serviced again. Instead, we want you to replace it with a new machine. It is clear that the machine is defective. We can no longer permit the interruptions caused by repeated breakdowns. We bought the machine because of your company‟s reputation for quality and service. We do not want to lose confidence in you. Please let us know when we can expect delivery of a replacement machine. Thank you for your cooperation. Yours faithfully, Manuel Lune (Manager) 20
32. Here below is a Vietnamese business letter: VĂN PHÒNG LUẬT SƯ SVN Email: lawyer@svnlaw.com-www.svnlaw.com. Điện thoại:84.4.2107538/2107583-Fax:84.4.7545068 Địa chỉ: Phòng 8.7 nhà A4 Làng Quốc tế Thăng Long, Cầu Giấy, Hà Nội  Kính gửi: BAN TRÙ BỊ THÀNH LẬP TRUNG TÂM NGOẠI NGỮ NEC (V/v: Thanh toán phí tư vấn tháng 12/2007 và tháng 1/2008 của Hợp đồng tư vấn pháp luật số KT-08/216.) NỘI DUNG CÔNG VIỆC: 1. Phí soạn thảo HĐ Hợp tác kinh doanh [ (2.039 từ:300 từ) x 500.000 VND/trang]: 3.398.000 VND + 2. VAT: 339.800 VND Tổng cộng: 3.737.800 VND Đề nghị quý Ban thực hiện việc thanh toán số tiền nói trên trong this hạn 05 ngày kể từ khi nhận được đề nghị này. Việc thanh toán được thực hiện bằng tiền mặt tại VPLS SVN, P8.7 nhà A4 Làng Quốc tế Thăng Long, Hà Nội hoặc bằng chuyển khoản đến địa chỉ sau: Người thụ hưởng: Văn phòng luật sư SVN Số tài khoản: 220.10.000085994 Tại Ngân hàng Đầu tư và Phát triển Việt Nam- Chi nhánh Thăng Long, tầng 1 nhà B2 làng Quốc tế Thăng Long, Trần Đăng Ninh, Cầu Giấy, Hà Nội. Trân trọng cảm ơn sự hợp tác của quý Ban. Hà Nội, ngày 09 tháng 3 năm 2008 VĂN PHÒNG LUẬT SƯ SVN Kế toán (chữ kí) Nguyễn Thị Mai 21
33. Above are the two different Commercial Correspondence of the two languages we can see clearly the differences in form between English and Vietnamese business letters. 2.3 Types of Commercial Correspondence There are almost as many types of Correspondence because there are many reasons for writing. That is why it is important to apply them suitably in both the situation and your reader‟s needs. It is helpful to know. However, many situations are so common that standard approaches have been developed. This part is devoted to a number of typical business letters:  Enquire letter  Reply and quotation letter  Order letter  Payment letter  Complaint and adjustment letter  Credit letter  Banking letter  Agent and agency letter  Transportation and shipping letter  Insurance letter  Memo and report  Personnel appointment letter  Transmittal letter  The acknowledgment letter  Refusal letter  Resignation letter 22
34.  Sale letter  Offer letter Apparently, Commercial Correspondences are various in number. They are certainly in common in a number of features but there are still some descriptive properties among them. Within the scope of this study the researcher cannot analyze in detail all sub- types of Commercial Correspondence as mentioned above. What is focused on this study is that written structures, personal pronoun, decision and attitude expressions in all kinds of Commercial Correspondence; some strategies to compose and translate them. 2.4 Politeness in Commercial Correspondence According to Leo Jones and R. Alexander [5: 19], the five main criterions of a business letter (beginning of “C”) in English: Clear (rõ ràng), Complete (hoàn chỉnh), Concise (súc tích), Courteous (lịch sự) and Correct (chính xác). In these criterions, courteous criterion is an important criterion in any types of Business Correspondence as well as in business communication. Formal letters contain words and expressions that is not common in daily speech: +, Formal language is used to show the writer‟s courtesy and respectful attitude that is very important in formal communication. +, Mainly use general bookish words or professional words. +, Avoid using non-standard words like slang, jargon etc or colloquial words like kids, guy, a lot, fellow etc; contractions like can‟t, won‟t, shouldn‟t etc; abbreviated words like photo, TV etc; imperative voice like remember etc. Or there has always colon after the recipient‟s name such as Dear Mss. Marry, Dear Mr. William, 23
35. CHAPTER 2: A STUDY ON WRITTEN STRUCTURES, PERSONAL PRONOUN, DECISION AND ATTITUDE EXPRESSIONS IN COMMERCIAL CORRESPONDENCE A, A study on written structures in Commercial Correspondence Business Correspondence is one of the most important tool helping corporations succeed. A persuasive business letter will bring a good effect greatly. There are many factors leading to success of a business letter. One of them is that how to use sentences effectively. 2.1 Overview of sentence kinds in Commercial Correspondence As chapter 1 mentioned, sentence is classified basing on many different criterions. In my research, we get the classification based on communicative function. Therefore, we are going to focus on four kinds of sentence: Statement, Question, Command and Exclamation. They are considered in two groups of Business Correspondence (50 pieces): written in English (36 pieces) and in Vietnamese (14 pieces). During the research, it shows that using these kinds of sentence is not very equal. Below is the charts of the percentage of sentence types used in every group: Chart No. 1: The percentage of sentence kinds used in Group 1 24
36. Chart No. 2: The percentage of sentence kinds used in Group 2 And here is the common table of the percentage of sentence kinds used in every group: Sentence kinds Group 1 Group 2 Statement 229/ 290 84/ 113 (79%) (74.2%) Question 18/ 290 5/ 113 (6%) (4.3%) Command 35/ 290 22/ 113 (12%) (19.8%) Exclamation 8/ 290 2/ 113 (3%) (1.7%) In general, according to the chart and the table above, we find that the percentage of using sentence kinds is very unequal. Statement is a sentence kind used mostly in both of the selected letter groups (occupying from 74.2% to 79%). Secondly is command (occupying from 12% to 19.8%). After that, question occupies quite light (from 4.3% to 6%). Finally is exclamation (only occupying from 1.7% to 3%). The reasons of the unequal are features and effects that bring into business letters in communication process. We are going to mention in the next part in details. 25
37. 2.2 Sentence kinds in Commercial Correspondence of English in comparison with one of Vietnamese. The comparative chart of the percentage of sentence kinds used in both of groups. Chart No. 3: The comparison of sentence kinds in 2 groups 2.2.1 Statement Statement sentence (declaration) is the most important type. You can, and will often write entire essays or reports using only declarative sentences. You should use them far more often than the other four types of sentence (statement, command, question, exclamation). A declarative sentence simply states a fact or an argument, states an idea, without requiring either an answer or an action from the reader. It does not give a command or request, nor does it ask a question. You punctuate your declarative sentence with a full stop(.). During the two selected letter groups, it indicates that statement is used popularly and is greatly important in every business letter. The percentage of statement (declarative) reaches nearly 80% in the whole of sentence kinds. In my opinion, the reasons, statement used mostly, are simple that features and good effects when using. Statement has the quite neutral meanings. Speakers present their concerned or considered problems simply and advantageously to 26
38. their partners, or keep a harmony and politeness with little unpleasure, therefore, keep a “face” to their partners and simply come to an agreement (get their final targets). Moreover, to present some problems, a sentence cannot convey information content enough, but a sequence of sentences can make. In this case, statement in comparison with the others is most suitable and always appears in a great frequency in business letters. Through the study, statement is used in both of groups addressing to the declaration and explanation of problems: composers want to announce to their partners about the potentiality of their companies or explain the state of commodities, even complain about something in cooperation process. From that, writers would like to send their messages of business to their partners. And we find that both of statement kinds appear in letters: Assertive statement and negative statement. Even, both of them are appeared in one sentence (compound sentence). It means that one clause forms an assertive statement, the other forms a negative statement. a,_ Assertive statement: Assertive statement is a sentence that confirms to the acts, states, qualities etc of a phenomenon. It does not often consist of negative words (not, no, yet ). However, in some cases, assertive statement consists of “no or not or yet” in the form “negation of negation” or “double negation” (assertion in the highest level). In the selected letters, assertive statements appear with a great volume (88%). This assertive statement below addresses to confirm the status of company operation: Như các ngài biết, chúng tôi cần sử dụng những thiết bị này ngay để xây dựng những công trình phụ của công trường và sau đó dùng để đào móng và san nền. (No. 5 Group 2) The below statement addresses to confirm the importance of this goods, the necessity of receiving this goods in time in an agreement: 27
39. At the beginning of March this year we took delivery of one of your LS 500 laser colour separation machines on order No. 5468. Since then, the machine has broken down six times. (Hồi đầu tháng 3 năm nay, chúng tôi đã nhận một chiếc máy chụp cắt lớp theo đơn đặt hàng số 5468. Từ đó đến nay, nó bị trục trặc 6 lần rồi.) (No. 1 Group 1) The two above statements are the assertive statements: the first confirms that A company ordered B company „s LS 500 laser colour separation machines at the beginning of March this year. The second confirms that the operation status of this item has broken down six times until now. Through the two assertive statements, part A wants to announce the status of machines‟ operation to part B. By that, part A sends the message of their unpleasure and complain of quality to part B. Almost 88% of assertive statements are common assertives (95%). Assertive in the highest level (negation of negation) appears in a low volume, only 5%. However, its good effects bring into letters greatly when using: Khi đặt hàng chúng tôi đã nhấn mạnh là những máy này sẽ phải được giao đúng hạn vào trung tuần tháng 7/ 2006. Hôm nay đã là 15/ 8 mà chúng tôi vẫn chưa nhận được số máy trên. Lẽ ra 19/ 8 chúng tôi đã khởi công trên công trường. Như các ngài biết, chúng tôi cần sử dụng những thiết bị này ngay để xây dựng những công trình phụ của công trường và sau đó dùng để đào móng và san nền. Chúng tôi không thể tiến hành thi công nếu không có các máy trên. (= Chúng tôi phải có các máy trên ngay lập tức.) (No. 5 Group 2) Statement in bold italic uses a double negation (negation of negation) in order to confirm the importance of this goods to the operating process of corporation. With the usage of double negation, Ha Noi general construction company sends their message “Quý ngài cần phải gửi ngay mặt hàng đó cho chúng tôi, không thể chậm trễ hơn được nữa” to their partner. Needless to say that “negation of negation” helps composers raising the importance of situation as well as still keeping a harmony to their partner. If it were replaced 28
40. by “Chúng tôi phải có các máy trên ngay lập tức”, atmosphere would become more stressful and their target would not complete. Please see below for some examples: As our last email, we explained that we only shipped out after successful inspection so there is no reason that payment for the hold invoice can not be accepted. (= The hold invoice must be paid.) (Như đã đề cập trong email trước, chúng tôi đã giải thích là chỉ sau khi đã kiểm tra hàng chúng tôi mới gửi hàng và như vậy sẽ chẳng có lý do gì khiến hoá đơn này không được chấp nhận thanh toán). (= Hoá đơn này phải được thanh toán dù bất cứ lí do gì.) (No. 6 Group 1) Our customers are big wholesalers and with them, profit is first, they don‟t care anything without profit. (= They only care profit.) (Khách hàng của chúng tôi đều là những nhà bán buôn lớn và họ luôn đặt lợi nhuận lên hàng đầu, họ không quan tâm đến những gì không mang lại lợi nhuận.) (= Họ chỉ quan tâm đến lợi nhuận.) (No. 16 Group 1) b,_ Negative statement Through the research, we find that negative statement appears no more than assertive statement (occupying 12 % of the statement‟s percentage). Its effects in business bring quiet greatly. However, in some cases, using of the assertive statements can loose a harmony between corporations and partners. Therefore, composers should use negative statements in order to avoid going straight to point: Nhà máy đã cô lập các đầu đấu nối nhị thử core số 4 lại để kiểm tra và khẳng định phần nhị thử của cuộn dây này đã bị chạm đất. Chúng không sử dụng được nữa. (= Chúng đã bị hỏng.) (No. 4 Group 2) 29
41. In this statement, the writer uses a negation to announce the broken status of product that the partner has just installed. However, negative statement brings into a complaint letter effectively because it makes an increase of the problem‟s importance, expresses their negative attitude to the partner‟s business techniques. Choosing this kind means that composers have run out of their patience and cannot keep a “face” because partners do business in the lack of reliability to them: Do Sở không có nhu cầu đặt mua bản tin trên nhưng quý cơ quan đã gửi đến nên Sở chỉ thanh toán tiền cho bản tin từ 01/ 07/ 2007 đến 30/ 11/ 2007 là 417.000đ. Đề nghị từ tháng 12/ 2007 trở đi quý cơ quan không gửi bản tin nữa và chúng tôi cũng không chịu trách nhiệm thanh toán. (No. 9 Group 2) This statement implies that part A does not agree, but part B still does business on purpose (part B still sells “news bulletin” without having an order from part A). In this case, part A can use a negative statement to confirm the unnecessity of part B‟ s action once more. On the contrary, in an apologize letter, negative statement is used to decrease the difficulty of problem or to explain the unwanted problem to both of parts, since then, to give the understanding to the partner, or simply to confirm the absence of some problems: No customers want to buy at high price even though they know that your products has high quality. (Chẳng khách hàng nào muốn mua hàng với giá cao mặc dù họ biết rằng sản phẩm của công ty quý ngài chất lượng rất tốt.) (No. 16 Group 1) In the two selected groups, negative statement is used mostly in group 2 (letters written in Vietnamese), partly in group 1 (letters written in English). Through the analysis and statistics, we give a conclusion: Assertive statements and negative statements are used effectively and suitably. An 30
42. assertive statement or a negative statement depends on a speech that company wants to make or purposes that company wants partner‟s cooperation to continue or not. Both of these kinds will bring good effects when they are applied suitably in certain situations. 2.2.2 Question As mentioned generally in the previous chapter, when expressing the questionable opinions and doubts: In Vietnamese, writers often use interrogative pronouns: “ai, gì, nào, thế nào, bao giờ ”; sentimental words in the end of sentence: “à, nhỉ, nhé, hả, hở ”; or adjuncts instead of interrogative pronouns: “có (hay) không? Có phải (hay) không? Đã (hay) chưa?”. In English, writers typically begin with question words such as “what, who, how, when, where ” or auxiliary verbs such as “do/ does, can or would ” in the beginning of sentence or tag questions “ ,don‟t you, , haven‟t they” in the end of sentence. An interrogative sentence is a type of sentence which usually asks a question and uses a question mark (?).They may ask for information or for confirmation or denial of a statement. By the process of analyzing and reckoning materials up, we can find that question is used in a small volume. It only occupies 6% (18/ 290) in the letters of English, 4.3% (5/ 113) in the letters of Vietnamese. Normally, interrogative is used to make a question and listeners need to answer this question: Is it now in Istanbul or Mersin? If your agent do not tell you how much they pay to customs, who will bear this cost? (Hiện giờ hàng đang ở Istanbul hay Mersin? Nếu đối tác của ngài không nói với ngài họ trả phí hải quan thì ai sẽ chịu chi phí này?) (No. 21 Group 1) Let the cargo sitting at Istanbul and put down the hands, is it a good solution? (Hãy cứ để lại hàng ở Istandbul và không can thiệp nữa, liệu có phải là một giải pháp hay?) 31
43. (No. 10 Group 1) After considering these questions, we can see the target of these questions focuses on price, origin, transportation and shipping, And these questions do correctly the illocutionary force of themselves (request listeners answering). However, it is very interesting that in the study, questions which have interrogative values (request information) are not great. Maybe, because these questions request partners giving their answers, they bring the great compulsive meanings (breaking a “positive face”). So, writers only use in the compulsory situations, particularly, they come to an agreement of price, origin before signing a contract or ask for the reasons of transportation and shipping when goods is missing Beside the direct illocutionary force, a question has the other derivative illocutionary forces: request, assertion, negation, exclamation, doubt In many cases, these forces are main expressions and questions simply play in an interrogative form: With regard to last order of 50Mt, could you send us instructions that we could amend the LC soon? (Liên quan đến đơn đặt hàng 50 mét tấn, quý ngài có thể sớm gửi cho chúng tôi chỉ dẫn để sửa đổi thư tín dụng được không? (=Đề nghị quý ngài sớm gửi cho chúng tôi chỉ dẫn để sửa đổi thư tín dụng). (No. 19 Group 1) In the selected letters, almost questions are used to show the other derivative illocutionary force, in general, to make a request to partners, scarcely to show the direct illocutionary force: After review your photos, I have a concern with one of the images- It looks like the box is grey, but the box should be black. Can you please confirm that all the boxes of 56pce suites for the New Zealand order are black? (Sau khi xem lại những tấm ảnh của quý ngài, chúng tôi có một chút băn khoăn về một trong những hình ảnh đó- Nó trông như thể là một cái hộp màu 32
44. xám, mà thực tế lẽ ra nó phải là màu đen. Xin hãy xác nhận rằng tất cả 56 bộ hộp quà đối với đơn đặt hàng New Zealand là màu đen.) (No. 8 Group 1) Look at the sentence in bold above, it has a form of question “?”, but, its aim is not to ask. It is a request to partner that “confirm that all the boxes of 56pce suites for the New Zealand order are black”. As a result, the value of the illocutionary force here is the value of a request, not a question. From that, we can see this is an indirect request that is not very compulsory and keeps a politeness in business communication. Below are some examples like that: Will you please send one round to inspect the damage and arrange for repair within the next week? (Xin hãy cử một nhân viên tới kiểm tra tổn thất và lên kế hoạch để khắc phục trong tuần tới.) (No. 5 Group 1) Could you check and support for us? (Hãy kiểm tra và hỗ trợ chúng tôi!) (No. 15 Group 1) On the contrary to these examples above, some sentences have no interrogative form, but the direct illocutionary force is to make a question. You can see: If it is still in Istanbul, I wonder when your agent will move it to Mersin. (Nếu như hàng vẫn còn ở Istanbul, tôi muốn hỏi đến khi nào đại lý của các ngài mới chuyển chúng tới Mersin. = Khi nào đại lý của quý ngài chuyển chúng tới Mersin?) (No. 21 Group 1) 33
45. When making a speech above, composers want to receive from readers a answer that they care. It is “when does goods come?”. But to avoid asking directly, composers use the way of “beating about the bush” or “asking himself”. By this way, composers both send his message and keep a harmony and politeness. Although question is used in a small volume, good effects that it brings into business are not small. It together with the others helps composers convey his message exactly and effectively. 2.2.3 Command Command sentence is that gives advice or instructions, orders or directives or that expresses a request or a command. In Vietnamese, we can use command words standing before the predication of a sentence: “hãy, đừng, chớ, nên, không được ” ; or copulatives: “nào, đi, nhé ” in the end of sentence; or some words: “đề nghị, yêu cầu, mong, xin ” in capacity of acting verbs in the beginning of sentence. In English, we often use “please” to express the aims of request. After studying, we see that command is used quite great in four kinds of sentence. The percentage of command ranks in the second position (after the percentage of statement). Through chart No. 3, it indicates that the percentage of Group 2 is more than that of Group 1 and command is used more than question and exclamation. Command occupies from 12% to 19.8%. As above- mentioned in chapter 1, command is a sentence containing writers‟ wishes and desires or requests that are done by readers. So, command can bring great effects and impacts. Because command has the direct illocutionary force, it is often used with a modification (biểu thức điều biến) in order to ensure a politeness, like “please” in English, “kính mong”, “xin” in Vietnamese. Therefore, the writer conveys his messages, desires tenderly and the reader receives these requests comfortably and satisfactorily. As a result, it is simple to reach a success in business negotiation: 34
46. Bằng công văn này, công ty EDH kính mong Quý ông cho phép chúng tôi giao hàng cho Quý công ty theo các mã hàng mới. (No. 8 Group 2) Making this speech with “kính mong”, the writer gives a request courteously and tenderly to the partner –“Mã hàng cũ đã hết, yêu cầu đối tác nhận mã hàng mới có chức năng và thông số kĩ thuật tương đương”. So, readers are simply persuaded because of client‟s respect: Please see some pictures of our bedding products for your reference and give us your further opinion. (Xin hãy tham khảo một số bức ảnh về sản phẩm bộ giường ngủ của chúng tôi và cho chúng tôi biết thêm ý kiến của các ngài.) (No. 14 Group 1) To get the wishes or desires, in the selected business letters, we mostly find that writers use questions with command values or direct command words. And “please” is considered as the most common tool in command in English: Please let us know when we can expect delivery of a replacement machine. (No.1 Group 1) Please issue sale contract to Toan Phat within today, they wish to open the LC this afternoon. (No. 19 Group 1) Beside “please”, in the business letters, the writer also uses “hope” to express a command. However, “hope” appears in a very small volume. Hope this sort of problem does not arise again. (Rất hy vọng vấn đề này sẽ không lặp lại lần nữa.) (No. 24 Group 1) 35
47. In the group of letters written in Vietnamese, expressions are more diversified: mong, đề nghị, xin, xin hãy, hy vọng Công ty chúng tôi rất mong được sự hợp tác của Quý công ty. (No. 2 Group 2) Kính đề nghị Quý công ty tiến hành thanh toán toàn bộ số tiền trước ngày 18/ 7/ 2007. (No. 1 Group 2) From these examples, writers often use “kính”, “tha thiết”, “hết sức”, “rất” before “mong”, “đề nghị”, “xin” Through the research and analysis, we find that command is mostly used in the selected letters, but with a small volume. Maybe, command together with a modification not only expresses the writer‟s wishes and desires directly but also keeps a “positive face”. Therefore, command brings good effects into business letters. 2.2.4 Exclamation Exclamation in Vietnamese, exclamatory words (ôi, chao ôi, ồ, ô hay, than ôi, trời ôi, trời đất ơi ) play a clear role in the attitude and sentiment expressions. Furthermore, we can use expressions that present the level of emotion or of assessment: thật, quá, lắm, ghê, cực kì Exclamation in English, we often use sentences with “How !”, “What ”. Exclamation is a sentence that expresses the strong feelings. In the selected letters, exclamation stands in the lowest position. It only occupies 1.7% in Vietnamese, 3% in English. Please return some recent previous pages to see profoundly. Most of the exclamations are used to present the writers‟ thanks to their partners: Chúng tôi xin chân thành cảm ơn! (No. 3 Group 2) 36
48. Thank you for your cooperation! (Trân trọng cảm ơn sự hợp tác của quý công ty!) (No. 1 Group 1) The percentage of exclamation ranks finally in the chart No. 3, frankly, in my opinion, the reason is that in general, exclamation doesn‟t suit to Business Correspondence (courteous texts). But, if we use them correctly in some certain situations, they contribute good effects to keeping a politeness and harmony between parts. Conclusion: By the process of studying, we find that all of these sentence kinds are used in certain purposes and bring good effects differently. They together with some other factors make a persuasive and formal letter. However, because of depending on their features, expression maybe is a statement or a question or a command or an exclamation. The percentage of them used is different: firstly, statement (from 74.2% to 79%); next, command (from 19.8% to 12%); and then, question (from 6% to 4.3%); finally, exclamation (from 3% to 1.7%). In general, the percentage of sentence kinds in the selected letters is quite suitably. Question and exclamation are used in a small volume, but, because of using correctly, they partly bring good effects to business letters. B, A study on personal pronoun in Commercial Correspondence As chapter 1 mentioned above, the importance of personal pronoun is very great. Mostly in clear communication, we often use the first person (speaker) and the second person (listener). However, in every different language, personal pronoun is expressed in the other ways with the different cultural connotations. As a result, Commercial Correspondence is not apart from this rule. For Vietnamese, because of sentimental characteristics and grade characteristics in culture, address forms in Vietnamese depend on these characteristics. Therefore, address forms are very various. Vietnamese often 37
49. use: kinship terms: anh, chị, chú, bác, ông, bà, ; titles and occupations: bác sĩ, giáo sư, chủ tịch, giám đốc, thầy, ; special pronouns: ngài, lão, ; personal pronouns: tôi, chúng tôi, nó or proper names: Lan, Hoa, in communication. However, in the business letters, the system of addressing is not various like that. For British, because of the cultural reasons, they mainly use: neutral personal pronouns: I, We, You ; or titles and occupations: professor, master, ; and special pronouns: Ms, Mr., Mss, Mrs., Sir, Madam . Below, we are going to deal with these matters more details of personal pronoun in the salutation of letters and in the body of letters: 2.1 The system of personal pronoun in the salutation: 2.1.1 The system of personal pronoun in the salutation of letters written in English The salutation often takes an important part in letters, particularly in a business letter. It helps writers express their attitude and relation to partners. It expresses the level of a relation or ensures a politeness to partners. Therefore, the usage of the salutation is not free, needs a careful choice. In the selected letters written in English, writers can use: personal name, special pronoun, title and occupation. However, title and occupation are used very little. Please see the below chart: Chart No. 4: The percentage of personal pronoun in the salutation used in Group 1 38
50. The chart above shows that in general, personal name is an important mean of addressing in the salutation of business letters. It occupies 67%, ranks in the first position. Dear Thuy, (No. 8 Group 1) Dear Mr. Nishu, (No. 12 Group 1) Using personal names is that writers would like to send their message to the wanted partners. So, receivers will directly solve the problems and there is a friendly atmosphere between senders and receivers. The salutation is used effectively and suitably. Almost, personal name is often combined with “Dear”, in some cases, particularly in e – mails, only a personal name or combined with “Hi” - very friendly. Only looking at the salutation, we suggest that their business cooperation is good or not: Hi Tran Hai Son, (No. 9 Group 1) Quynh Chi, (No. 10 Group 1) In the second position, special pronouns (Madam, Sir, Sirs, Mr., Ms) occupy 28%. They are not as friendly as personal names, but, they upgrade the importance of partners from writers and keep a formal face to partners. Dear Madams/ Sirs (No. 17 Group 1) Dear Sir, (No. 24 Group 1) In the thirsty- six selected letters, only two of them is used with a title: Dear Customers, (No. 35 Group 1) To whom it may concern: (No. 32 Group 1) Perhaps, the usage of title causes to space between senders and receivers in communication. So, title is rarely considered in the salutation. We can give a conclusion that personal name and special pronoun is often used in the salutation. 39
51. 2.1.2 The system of personal pronouns in the salutation of letters written in Vietnamese As above mentioned, the system of ones written in Vietnamese is very various. Therefore, the business letters written in Vietnamese are also used quite more various than that in English. Chart No. 5: The percentage of personal pronoun in the salutation used in Group 2 The chart No. 5 indicates from A to Z that department‟s name (36%), personal name + title (21%), only title (21%), company „s name (15%), and department in a polite form (7%). In group 2, department‟s name occupies mostly. Kính gửi: Phòng Dịch Vụ - Cục Quản Lý Thị Trường Hà Nội (No. 10 Group 2) Unlike in Group 1, Vietnamese rarely uses personal names without adding a title: Kính gửi: Bà: Trần Thị Ngọc Nga Phó Giám đốc Công ty Cổ phần Đầu tư phát triển nhà & xây dựng Tây Hồ - Hà Nội 40
52. Trụ sở: Số 9/2 Đặng Thai Mai, Tây Hồ, Hà Nội. Công ty Du lịch & Thể thao Việt Nam – Viet ran Tour xin gửi tới Quý công ty lời chào trân trọng. (No. 1 Group 2) Title is mainly used in the selected letters: Kính gửi: ÔNG GIÁM ĐỐC CÔNG TY ĐIỆN LỰC THÀNH PHỐ HÀ NỘI (No. 8 Group 2) Then company‟s name: Kính gửi: Công ty TOCONTAP Hà Nội, 36 Bà Triệu, thành phố Hà Nội, Việt Nam (No. 5 Group 2) Finally, department in a polite form: Thưa quý Ban, (No. 12 Group 2) From these examples above, we can see that the salutation in letters written in Vietnamese is chosen very carefully and effectively and often added “Kính gửi”. During the study, in the salutation of letters written in English, there is no “address himself” of writers, is only “address partner”, but that in Vietnamese, there are both of them: Công ty Du lịch & Thể thao Việt Nam – Touran xin gửi tới Quý công ty lời chào trân trọng. (No. 1 Group 2) However, “address himself” appears in a small volume, is often “Company‟s name”- a community characteristic in Vietnamese culture. 41
53. By studying on the system of personal pronouns in the salutation, we can see that choosing the address forms depends on culture and habits of using language. Language partly reflects its culture. This is considered as an interesting interference in language, but this is a negative interference than a positive interference. 2.2 The system of personal pronouns in the body: 2.2.1 The system of personal pronouns in the body of letters written in English During the research, we see that most of the personal pronouns in the body is neutral pronoun: the first person (I, We), the second person (You). Beside that, company name is also used: Chart No. 6: The percentage of personal pronoun in the body used in Group 1 The above chart indicates that the plural first person “We” and the second person “You” is used in a large volume. In both of the first persons “I” and “We”, the former stands for individual and the later stands for people community. In the business letters, writers represent their company - a community to exchange views on their common concerns to clients. So, choosing of “We” is very suitable: 42
54. We have visited Bianca website and booth at Heimtextile to see that those products are so nice. (Chúng tôi đã truy cập vào trang web Bianca tại Heimtextile và thấy rằng những sản phẩm đó thực sự rất đẹp.) (No. 14 Group 1) However, if the relationship between writers and partners are close, or writers assert that on behalf of company, he can solve the problem by himself or expresses his anxiety. In these cases, writers should use “I”. In my opinion, this is a stylish and impressive way. Although the salesperson discussed a three- year extended warranty with me, I decided against purchasing that service for $299. However, when my credit card statement arrived this month, I noticed an extra $299 charge from Good Vibes, Inc. I suspect that this charge represents the warranty I declined. (Dù cho người bán hàng đã thảo luận với tôi về việc bảo hành được kéo dài trong 3 năm, tôi vẫn quyết định là không chấp nhận dịch vụ này với giá $299. Tuy nhiên, khi nhận sao kê tài khoản tín dụng trong tháng này, tôi thấy có một khoản phí $299 bị trừ do công ty Good Vibes. Tôi ngờ rằng đây chính là khoản phí bảo hành mà tôi đã từ chối.) (No. 34 Group 1) After review your photos I have a concern with one of the images- It looks like the box is grey, but the box should be black. (Sau khi xem lại những tấm ảnh của quý ngài tôi có một chút băn khoăn về một trong những hình đó- nó trông như thể là một cái hộp màu xám, mà lẽ ra nó phải là màu đen.) (No. 8 Group 1) “Co. name” mainly appears in the English letters written by Vietnamese: First of all, we would like to express our best regards to China Embassy and Koshin Tours. 43
55. (Trước tiên, Chúng tôi xin gửi lời chào trân trọng nhất tới Đại sứ quán Trung Quốc và Hãng du lịch Koshin.) (No. 17 Group 1) We, Overseas Transport Corporation are a forwarding firm in Vietnam and are looking for a reliable agent in Singapore. (Chúng tôi – Overseas Transport Corporation- là một hãng giao nhận tại Việt Nam hiện đang tìm kiếm đại lý tin cậy tại Singapore. (No. 20 Group 1) From these examples, we see that Co. name is not only the first person but also the second person. However, “You” which is the second person is used mostly. We would also like to know if you are offering any trade discounts. (Chúng tôi cũng rất muốn biết liệu công ty ngài có chào chiết khấu thương mại hay không?) (No. 4 Group 1) I am writing to you to complain about the consignment we ordered our No. MT 4786 which signed on 20 October 2007. (Mục đích tôi viết thư này tới công ty ngài là để khiếu nại về chuyến hàng theo đơn đặt hàng và hợp đồng số MT 4786 được ký ngày 20/11/2007.) (No. 24 Group 1) 2.2.2 The system of personal pronouns in the body of letters written in Vietnamese Look at the chart below, please: 44
56. Chart No. 7: The percentage of personal pronoun in the body used in Group 2 The table of personal pronoun in the body used in Group 2: Ngôi thứ nhất Số lượng Tỷ lệ Ngôi thứ hai Số Tỷ lệ lượng Tôi / Chúng tôi 53 / 113 46.9 % Quý công ty 13 / 113 11.5 % Tên công ty 13 / 113 11.5 % Các ngài / 10 / 113 8.9 % Quý ngài Quý ông 13 / 113 11.5 % Quý phòng / 11 / 113 9.7 % Ban Tỷ lệ 58.4 % Tỷ lệ 41.6 % From the chart and table, we see that the system of personal pronouns in the body is classified into the two persons: the first person (58.4%) and the second person (41.6%), no the third person. This system (chúng tôi, tôi, tên công ty, quý ngài, quý ông, quý phòng, quý ban ) is more various than the above system (I, We,You, Co. name). However, the distribution of them is properly different: “Tôi” stands for individual, doesn‟t appear in letters written in Vietnamese. Although writers take a direct responsibility to solve the 45
57. problems or even they can decide all of the problems in business, they represent people community- company to exchange. As a result, writers often use “chúng tôi” in business letters (47%): Theo yêu cầu từ phía Quý công ty, chúng tôi đã thực hiện đầy đủ dịch vụ cho đoàn theo hợp đồng số 142/ HĐKT ký ngày 8/5/2007. Căn cứ theo thanh lý hợp đồng số 142/HĐKT ký ngày 24/7/2007, chúng tôi làm công văn này kính đề nghị Quý công ty thanh toán hết số tiền còn lại là 2795,77 USD. (No. 1 Group 2) Moreover, writers also use “tên công ty”, “Quý công ty”, “Quý công ty”: Về việc giao hàng cho hợp đồng số 63 ĐLHN/VT/2007, Công ty EDH xin được trình bày với Quý công ty về mục hàng số 5, 6 – Rơle bảo vệ quá đong KCEG142. (No. 8 Group 2) Conclusion: By studying on the system of personal pronouns in the salutation and in the body, personal pronoun often takes an important role in letters, particularly in a business letter. We can see that choosing the address forms depends on culture and habits of using language. Language partly reflects its culture. So, address forms in Vietnamese are more various than that in English. Because it is not suitable to the cultural characteristics of partners‟ countries, specially, native speakers. This is considered as an interesting interference in language, but this is a negative interference than a positive interference. C, A study on decision and attitude expressions in Commercial Correspondence (Modality) 2.1 Modality in letters written in English English modality can be expressed by the process called grammaticalization (in the form of mood) and lexicalization (by means of lexical items like modal verbs and modal adverbs, or some other lexical verbs). When the modal meanings are expressed by words such as “really, certainly, must, can ”, we 46
58. say that they are expressed lexically (lexicalization); if modality finds its expression in the opposition of forms (grammatical categories), we will say that it is manifested grammatically. This process is called grammaticalization. My research shows that modality is expressed mainly by the process of lexicalization, and in details, by two main kinds: auxiliaries and modal adjuncts. However, auxiliaries are used more popularly and widely than modal adjuncts: Chart No. 8: The percentage of modality used in Group 1 The total of sentences is 290, the total of sentences using modality is 125. Needless to say that the frequency of modality is very high. In the two kinds studied, auxiliary is used nearly six times of modal adjunct. 1/- Auxiliaries: can, could, may, will, shall, must, might, would, should, ought to and among modal verbs above, “dare/ need/ used to” can function as both lexical verbs or modals in some certain cases. Among of them, “Can, could, will, would” are used in a large volume. They mostly appear in all the selected letters and bring good effects into communication. “Can/ could”, “will/ would” are often used to show a possibility and an ability or give a request or a command to partners or ask a permission to do something. “Can/ will” give a direct illocutionary force than “could/ would” do, but, “could/ would” are more polite than “can/ will” are. 47
59. It would also be helpful if you could send is some samples and of they are of the standard we require, we will place a substantial order. (No. 4 Group 1) Sometime, we can use “please” to replace “would/ could”, but, “would/ could” are more courteous. “Can/ will” express a temporary intention and willingness, or an action that will happen in the future. In the certain situations, they has the different meanings. “Can/ will” also express a pleasure when giving a help to another. By the way, they express a writers‟ promise to partners. Today I will check with the factory about new production of Itoyori for you and will give you the shipments schedule. (No. 12 Group 1) Beside that, we use “should, must, need, shall” to express the modality. They appear not as much as “can, could, will, would”. However, they bring a great good effect to writers. “Should, must, need, shall” also give a command or a request, an advice, a permission. “Must/need” used to give a request but they have the implication of compulsion: Our office now has 18 computers work stations and 6 printers as we must secure to desks or counter. (No. 1 Group 1) Meanwhile I need to reiterate that no shipping does including the invoice will go with cargos and all relevant does should have notified parties state “Chris Everitt Ltd”. (No. 6 Group 1) In comparison with “need”, “must” has the level of imposition and necessary message lower than “need” does. 48
60. “Shall” is rarely used in modern English language. But, only when we want to give a suggestion, we should use “shall”: If you require further information, I shall be pleased to help you personally. (No. 2 Group 1) By researching, auxiliaries are used to express the certain targets and they bring good effects differently. 2/- Modal adjuncts: maybe, perhaps, probably, possibly, surely, hopefully modify the whole sentence. Beside auxiliaries, modal adjuncts are also very important. Modal adjuncts are used in a small volume than auxiliaries do. The percentage of modal adjuncts is 15%. However, their good effects are quite considerably. “Really” appears effectively and in a large volume. It focuses on the fact of actions or the status or quality of goods. The appearance of “really” makes a sentence emphasize. “Really” helps command sentences become more persuasive and wishes or hopes become more urgent: We would like to say that although we really sympathize with this situation we hope that this sort of problem does not arise again. (No. 24 Group 1) In the only case, writers can use “actually” to replace “really”: Actually, due to your business seem growing up and continue to support to us that this has resulted in great impetus toward loyalty to us. (No. 9 Group 1) “Kindly” also appears in the business letters with the meanings: “làm ơn, vui lòng": Please kindly note that words “SL: 190 chiếc” should be removed from outer carton labels. 49
61. (No. 7 Group 1) Please check with your accounting department for this issue and arrange to settle payment for us before Mar 10th 2008 and kindly let me know the result of your prompt action. (No. 6 Group 1) From the above examples, we can see that “really” is independent, “kindly” always goes along with “please”. Beside that, “certainly” is used to assert surely to something. From that, we will consolidate a trust to partners: There would certainly be no trouble in supplying you from our wide selection of garments which we make for all age groups. (No. 3 Group 1) Writers can use “surely” to replace “certainly”: If the case come opposite, surely OVC will do whatever can do to solve the problems first the discuss, won‟t you? (No. 10 Group 1) Moreover, writers can use many other modal adjuncts like: maybe, sincerely, faithfully, particularly In those, “maybe” gives a suggestion or a prediction; “sincerely/ faithfully” express a friendliness; “particularly” emphasizes on something: We have not the model BD-210L, maybe you can choose the model BD- 280, the net capacity for BD-208 is 208 Liter. (No. 11 Group 1) In the past few weeks a number of faults have appeared in the electrical circuits and the flooring which have been particularly dangerous to our customers. (No. 5 Group 1) 50
62. The above auxiliaries and modal adjuncts are used to express the modality in the business letters that we study on. Their contribution is very great because they present the writers‟ decision and attitude expressions to partners. 2.2 Modality in letters written in Vietnamese Modality in daily conversation is very interesting and various. However, modality in the letters written in Vietnamese particularly Commercial Correspondence is used quite little and its good effects are not very considerably. Therefore, modality is going to be given in general. Tình thái Số lượng Tỉ lệ / Tổng Các phó từ: đã, sẽ, đang, từng, vừa, mới 30 / 69 43.5 % Các vị từ tình thái tính: toan, định, cố, muốn, đành, bị, 9 / 69 13 % bỏ, hãy, đừng, chớ Các vị từ chỉ thái độ mệnh đề: tôi e rằng, tôi sợ rằng, tôi 0 0 nghĩ rằng Các quán ngữ tình thái: ai bảo, nói gì thì nói, thảo nào, 0 0 tội gì Các vị từ ngôn hành: ra lệnh, van, xin, đề nghị, yêu 22 / 69 31.9 % cầu Các thán từ: ôi, eo ôi, chao ôi, ồ 0 0 Các tiểu từ tình thái: à, ừ, nhỉ, nhé, thôi, chứ đi, mất 0 0 Các vị từ đánh giá: may (là), đáng mừng (là), đáng buồn 0 0 (là) Các trợ từ: đến, những, mỗi, nào, ngay,cả, chính 3 / 69 4.3 % Đại từ nghi vấn (P làm gì? P thế nào?), các liên từ dùng 0 0 trong các câu hỏi (Hay P?, Hay là P?) Điều kiện giả định: nếu thì, giá thì, cứ thì 5 / 69 7.3 % Basing on the analysis and figures, modality is presented mostly in adverbs (các phó từ) - 43.5% and acting verbs (các vị từ ngôn hành) - 31.9%: Khi đặt hàng chúng tôi đã nhấn mạnh là những máy này sẽ phải được giao đúng hạn vào trung tuần tháng bảy, 2006. Hôm nay đã là ngày 15 tháng 51
63. 8 mà chúng tôi vẫn chưa nhận được số máy trên. Lẽ ra 19 tháng 8 chúng tôi đã khởi công trên công trường. (No. 5 Group 2) Đề nghị từ tháng 12/ 2007 trở đi quý cơ quan không gửi bản tin nữa và chúng tôi cũng không chịu trách nhiệm thanh toán. Kính đề nghị quý cơ quan gửi hoá đơn tài chính cho Sở theo mã số: 260701200017. (No. 9 Group 2) Modality in letters in Vietnamese (written language) is not presented as variously as that in daily conversation (spoken language). Maybe, the reasons are that Commercial Correspondence is always in a formal form; It is not only simply business communication but also can affect the existence of the whole enterprises. Therefore, the expressions of modality is chosen and used very carefully and considerably. CHAPTER 3: FINDINGS AND IMPLICATIONS A, Findings England and Vietnam are the two countries which have the two completely different economies. The former is the one which has a developed capitalism economy, the later is the one which has a developing socialism economy. Therefore, their people‟s thoughts are different too, especially in trade and commercial field. Composing and translating Commercial Correspondence are activities which majorly depend on writer‟s ways of thinking. The English‟s thought is quick, accurate and concise. That is why their way of writing is the same. On the contrary, the Vietnamese‟s thought is slow redundant and trends to stating cause or reason for the problem but does not focus on the solutions. Therefore, the Vietnamese‟s way of writing is the same. Language partly 52
64. reflects its culture. If composers and translators understand this problem it will be easier for them to do their composing and translating. Because of this cultural interference (a negative interference is more than a positive interference is), during my research, we find that there are many mistakes in letters written by Vietnamese, even basic wrongs. The aims of the study is mainly comparison of real situation between written sentence, personal pronoun and modality in Business Correspondence, and from then, finds out some strategies to compose a good letter for students of business and commerce. But, due to the limited length and time of the paper, we can not focus on mistakes in details. I think this problem should leave an other further research. However, in this part, we would like to give the outline of some mistakes that composers often make:  Form: - Making a mistake of form. Ex: The opening of the letter (salutation) is “Dear sir,”, but the closing of the letter is “sincerely”. It must be “faithfully”. Or, often omit the part of “enclosure” in need. Or, compose in incorrect rules of form. - Not identifying of the purpose of the letters. - Monotonous sentence structures.  Style: - Not getting to the points. Ex: No. 13 Group 1 - Making mistakes between expressions in writing and in speaking; or mixing of American English and British English in a letter. Ex: “As you know, ”, “Of course ” - Sentence or word usually is expressed following Vietnamese mind. Or sometimes, misunderstanding because of the non- equivalence in culture (often in letters and e- mails written by Vietnamese).  Language: - Using unfamiliar acronyms, abbreviation or technical language. 53
65. Ex: If selling goods by CIF price, buyer would not have the responsibility of cost, insurance and freight. - Not reading it over before sending it. So, getting bad spelling and grammar, missed words. Ex: “After review your photos ” - Fragments, run- on sentences, missing or incorrect punctuations. Ex: “Dear Nha Trang”, “Mr Flintstone:” B, Implications 3.1 Solutions Because a letter is a written record, it must be accurate, clear, pure and concise. Facts, figures, dates and explanations that do not meet the requirement above may cost the company or your client time, money, and goodwill. When we sign a letter, we are responsible for what it says. We should review a letter before mailing it. Whenever possible, ask someone who is familiar with the situation to review an important letter listen with an open mind to any criticisms of what you have said. Make whatever changes you believe are necessary. Again, remember that if you sign a letter, you are responsible for it contents. Here are some solutions to help students write Business Letter very well and effectively: “Golden rules” for writing letters (including faxes and memos) are always in your mind: - Give your letter a heading if it will make it easier for the reader to understand your purpose in writing. - Decide what you are going to say before you start to write or dictate a letter because if you don‟t do this the sentences are likely to go on and on and on until you can think of a good way to finish. In other words, you should always plan a head. - Use short sentences. - Put each separate idea in a separate paragraph. Number each of the paragraphs if it will help the reader to understand better. 54
66. - Use short words that everybody can understand – Think about your reader: your letters should get 5 “C”: clear, complete, concise, courteous, correct.  Clear (must be able to see exactly what you mean)  Complete (must be given all the necessary information)  Concise (is probably a busy person with no time to waste)  Courteous (must be written in a sincere/ polite tone)  Correct (should not be distracted by mistakes in grammar, punctuation or spelling) You should remember that a dull or confusing layout makes a letter difficult to read! Therefore, remind to plan a letter before writing: 7 steps 1) Write down your aim: what is the purpose of this letter? 2) Assemble all the relevant information and documents: copies of previous correspondence, reports, figures 3) Arrange the points in order of importance, decide which points are irrelevant and can be left out, make rough notes. 4) Write an outline in note form, check it through considering these questions: - Have you left any important points out? - Can the order of presentation be made clearer? - Have you included anything that is not relevant? 5) Write a first draft, leaving plenty of space for changes and revisions. 6) Revise your first draft by considering these questions. - Information: Does it cover all the essential points? Is the information relevant, correct and complete? - English: Are the grammar, spelling and punctuation correct? - Style: Does it look attractive? Does it sound natural and sincere? Is it clear, concise and courteous? Will it give the reader the right impression? Is it the kind of letter you would like to receive yourself? 7) Write, type or dictate your final version. And surely, you will complete your letter in the best level. 55
67. 3.2 Teaching and learning proposals Textbook: A handbook of Commercial Correspondence – Ashley, A. Oxford University Press is very interesting and useful. A Handbook of Commercial Correspondence Posted by: Michaelhoan | Date: 16 April 2008 16:30 | Author: A. Ashley | Publisher: Oxford University Press | ISBN: 0194572064 | 1998 Year | pdf, 297 pages | Language: English | 18,2 MB The essential reference guide to writing effective business correspondence – now revised and updated. All the information and examples you need for writing business correspondence for study purposes or for work. A practical approach that‟s ideal for class, the office, or at home, email correspondence, glossary of business terms, answers to exercises, and improved design. English level: Intermediate to Advanced Or you can visit free website at commercial-correspondence 56
68. PART THREE: CONCLUSION 1: Summary of the study It cannot be denied that today, English is the most widely spoken language in the history of our planet. Above half of the world‟s books are written in English and the majority of international telephone calls are made in English. In addition to this, English is the language of over sixty percent of the world‟s radio programs. More than seventy percent of international mail is written in English and addressed in English, and eighty percent of all computer text is stored in English. Therefore, translation plays an important roll in dealing with those stored in English, especially in the age of globalization. Being aware of the importance of translation in general, composition and translation of Commercial Correspondence in particular, I made up my mind on a study on written structures, personal pronoun, decision and attitude expressions in Commercial Correspondence including three main parts in this paper of which part two is the focal point. I would also like to give as many examples as possible (totally 50 letters) which are of the best selections from every source in both English and Vietnamese in order to make you have a wide and clear understanding of my study. Hoping that this study can help readers and learners, especially those who work in the economic field of translation related to Commercial Correspondence. Due to the limitation of time and the length of paper; comprehensive knowledge of mine in this field, my research paper may not satisfy the readers entirely. There will remain some shortcomings and limitation in the paper and some aspects of the subject could not be mentioned. Yet, it might be guide readers to other interesting ideas of the subject for further researches. 2: Some suggestions for further research 57
69. A study on written structures, personal pronoun, decision and attitude expressions in Commercial Correspondence is a profound and board subject to research. I am fully aware that my study is only a very tiny research on this field. Therefore, I would like to give some suggestions which may be useful for further researches.  Study thoroughly on mistakes in Commercial Correspondence and its solutions.  Study on translation of English terms related to Commercial Correspondence.  Study on how to write effectively a letter of Commercial Correspondence. Once again, I would like to send my sincere thanks to the ones who I love for their support and encouragement during my study. My deep thanks also go to all! Student Dinh Thi Thu Ha 58
70. REFERENCES [1] Ashley, A. (1993). A hand book of Commercial Correspondence. Oxford University Press. [2] Yule, G. (1996). Pragmatics. Oxford University Press. [3] Yule, G. (1997). Pragmatics. Oxford University Press. [4] Brown, P. and Levisohn, S. (1987). Politeness. Cambridge University Press [5] Jones, L. and Alexander, R. (1996). New International Business English. Cambridge University Press. [6] Lan Hương, Việt Hoàng và Khái Phương, Jane Eyre, (sách song ngữ), NXB Thanh niên, 2002. [7] Understanding English Semantics. VNU Publishing House – Ha Noi, 2004. [8] [1913 Webster] Lac Viet- multimedia tool for building multilingual dictionaries. [9] World web Dictionary- Encyclopedia. [10] Trọng Đàn, Ngôn ngữ thư tín thương mại Tiếng Anh, NXB Giáo dục, 1997. [11] Nguyễn Trọng Đàn, Câu mẫu thư tín thương mại quốc tế, NXB Thống kê, 1998. [12] Nguyễn Thiện Giáp (chủ biên), Dẫn luận Ngôn ngữ học, NXB Giáo dục, 2003. [13] Nguyễn Văn Hiệp, Hướng đến một cách miêu tả và phân loại các tiểu từ tình thái cuối câu tiếng Việt// Tạp chí ngôn ngữ, số 5, 2001. [14] Nguyễn Văn Hiệp, Khái niệm tình thái trong ngôn ngữ học// Tạp chí ngôn ngữ, số 7 và số 8, 2003. [15] Nguyễn Thị Lệ Hằng. MA, Subject: Grammar III. 59
71. [16] Nguyễn Thị Yến Thoa. MA, Subject: Semantics. [17] L. G. Alexander, Longman English Grammar, Longman House – London and New York. [18] Leo Jones, Richard Alexander, New International Business English, student‟s book, Cambridge University Press, 1998. [19] Phan Thế Hưng, Đinh Kim Quốc Ba, Hoàng Hà, Nguyên Phương, Tiếng Anh trong giao dịch thương mại quốc tế, NXB Trẻ, 2004. [20] Mai Ngọc Chừ, Vũ Đức Nghiệu, Hoàng Trọng Phiến, Cơ sở ngôn ngữ học và Tiếng Việt, NXB Giáo dục, 2006. [21] Nguyễn Văn Phước, Trần Hưng Việt, Phạm Thị Thơ, Phạm Văn Bằng, New complete book of modern effective letters, NXB thành phố Hồ Chí Minh, 2001. [22] Nguyễn Văn Phước, Understanding and using English grammar, Betty Schrampfer Azar. APPENDIX 60
72. Statistics tables of the percentage of sentence kinds, personal pronoun and attitude & decision expressions used in commercial correspondence I. The percentage of sentence kinds: 1. The percentage in every group: Group 1 (total of sentence: 290) Sentence kinds Quantity / Total Percentage Statement 229 / 290 79% Question 18 / 290 6% Command 35 / 290 12% Exclamation 8 / 290 3% Group 2 (total of sentence: 113) Sentence kinds Quantity / Total Percentage Statement 84 / 113 74.2% Question 5 / 113 4.3% Command 22 / 113 19.8% Exclamation 2 / 113 1.7% 2. The percentage of every sentence kind: Statement Name group Quantity / Total Percentage Group 1 229 / 290 79% Group 2 84 / 113 74.2% Question Name group Quantity / Total Percentage Group 1 18 / 290 6% Group 2 5 / 113 4.3% 61
73. Command Name group Quantity / Total Percentage Group 1 35 / 290 12% Group 2 22 / 113 19.8% Exclamation Name group Quantity / Total Percentage Group 1 8 / 290 3% Group 2 2 / 113 1.7% II. The percentage of personal pronoun: 1. The percentage of personal pronoun in the salutation of letters: Written in English (36 letters) Quantity / Total Percentage Madam / Sir / Sirs 10 / 36 27.7% Personal name 24 / 36 66.7% Title 2 / 36 5.6% Written in Vietnamese (14 letters) Ngôi xưng hô Số lượng / Tổng Tỷ lệ Tên công ty 2 / 14 15% Quý phòng / Ban 1 / 14 7% Chức danh 3 / 14 21% Tên riêng + Chức danh 3 / 14 21% 62
74. Tên phòng / Ban 5 / 14 36% 2. The percentage of personal pronoun in the body of letters: Written in English Personal pronoun I We You Co. name Quantity / Total 35 / 216 124 / 216 49 / 216 8 / 216 Percentage 16% 57% 23% 4% Written in Vietnamese Ngôi thứ nhất Số lượng Tỷ lệ Ngôi thứ hai Số Tỷ lệ lượng Tôi / Chúng tôi 53 / 113 46.9% Quý công ty 13 / 113 11.5% Tên công ty 13 / 113 11.5% Các ngài / 10 / 113 8.9% Quý ngài Quý ông 13 / 113 11.5% Quý phòng / 11 / 113 9.7% Ban Tỷ lệ 58.4% Tỷ lệ 41.6% III. The percentage of attitude & decision expressions (modality): Written in English Total of Total of Quantity Quantity Percentage Percentage sentences used of of modal (1) (2) sentences auxiliaries adjuncts (1) (2) 290 125 106 19 85% 15% 63
75. Written in Vietnamese Tình thái Số lượng Tỉ lệ / Tổng Các phó từ: đã, sẽ, đang, từng, vừa, mới 30 / 69 43.5% Các vị từ tình thái tính: toan, định, cố, muốn, đành, bị, 9 / 69 13% bỏ, hãy, đừng, chớ Các vị từ chỉ thái độ mệnh đề: tôi e rằng, tôi sợ rằng, tôi 0 0 nghĩ rằng Các quán ngữ tình thái: ai bảo, nói gì thì nói, thảo nào, 0 0 tội gì Các vị từ ngôn hành: ra lệnh, van, xin, đề nghị, yêu 22 / 69 31.9% cầu Các thán từ: ôi, eo ôi, chao ôi, ồ 0 0 Các tiểu từ tình thái: à, ừ, nhỉ, nhé, thôi, chứ đi, mất 0 0 Các vị từ đánh giá: may (là), đáng mừng (là), đáng buồn 0 0 (là) Các trợ từ: đến, những, mỗi, nào, ngay, cả, chính 3 / 69 4.3% Đại từ nghi vấn (P làm gì? P thế nào?), các liên từ dùng 0 0 trong các câu hỏi (Hay P?, Hay là P?) Điều kiện, giả định: nếu thì, giá thì, cứ thì 5 / 69 7.3% 64